They tell you in the Army,
the coffee's fine.
It's good for cuts and bruises,
it tastes like turpentine.

Chorus:
I don't want any more of Army life
Gee, Mom, I want to go home.

The biscuits that they give us,
they say are mighty fine.
Well, one fell off the table
and crushed a pal of mine.

The clothing that they give us,
they say is mighty fine.
Me and half my regiment
can all fit into mine.

The salary they pay us,
they say is mighty fine.
They pay you fifty dollars,
they take back sixty-nine.

 

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Lyrics courtesy of Judy Caplan Ginsburh.
© Plumjuice Music / ASCAP. All rights reserved.