This song is also available on Professor Boggs' Round the World with Science!
Pirates on the dichotomous sea
Searchin' for the dichotomous key
When we find it, We Shall Rule!
We'll have the ultimate classifyin' tool.
Names for everything is what we seek
Knowledge to make your knees go weak!
We'll name everything, just you see
Once we find the dichotomous key
[What makes a person a pirate, Captain? Why, they just Arrrrrrrrrr..]
Mystery animals, Walk the plank!
We'll have names (we can take 'em to the bank)
Under the Jolly Roger we'll sail free
Naming life's diversity
To pillage these names we need a guide
Something to look at and decide
What's the nearest similarity
We call that guide the dichotomous key!
[Land ho, Captain! Arrr, that must be the Lost Island of Linnaeus! At last, the
dichotomous key will be MINE! Doesn't di stand for two, Captain? No, di stands for
Cut 'em up, slice 'em up, chop 'em in two
One pile for me and one for you
Split 'em all up around one trait
One for the captain, one for the mate!
Take each pile and split 'em up again
Label each pile with your pirate pen
Sort 'em all out by the things you see
Soon you'll have a dichotomous key!
[It's the treasure chest, Captain! There it is, at last!
Open it up, ya scurvy dog!
Is it the
fabled dichotomous key?
Oh, no...it's just another field guide! ARRRRRR! Bilgewater!"]
See more of our Pirates, Life Science and Science Song Lyrics
Many thanks to Larry Morris (Professor Boggs) for permission to display these lyrics and comments.
© Professor Boggs. All rights reserved. Used with permission.
Life Science Song Lyrics
Pirate Song Lyrics
Science Song Lyrics